Wednesday, November 29, 2006

somehow this settles me

a text, one that I knew would come, even hours before I said, you know, it's just been too quiet on his end, and I've been quiet on my end, so I just have a feeling something's going to happen over there, with him [unnecessary accessory guy].

and wouldn't you know it, there he was. not on his knees, but not in top form. And lucky for him, I was watching the Bears game and drinking my liver dry, and I hadn't had dinner and my head was a sea of beer, and I texted and called him and told him my true feelings (which I didn't even know I had; amazing how booze causes a reaction similar to truth serum in me).

the result of which he admitted (after some questioning from me) that he thinks about our time together.

for some reason, this makes me happy, if there was anyone in the world it would be hard to entertain and keep the boredom at bay with, it was him,

and somehow that he's bored enough with the rest of his life and feels the need to make contact with me again (despite my efforts to remain passive and uninterested and writing him a eulogy in the flog blog!) makes me feel glad.

and yet, the truth is, I know he simply wants to poke and provoke me and get a rise out of me. I have no thoughts of any other motive, and wouldn't believe him if he tried to object to that assessment.

so the good news is I get to know him, without having to be in a real, intimate relationship with him, which would be as damaging to me as eating glass for breakfast.

and I get to use all the metaphors and similes and write the way I like.

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